Money Tips For Making Marriage Work

When divorce attorneys are surveyed about what the leading causes of divorce is, money seems to always be in the top two or three in their list. Ask any financial advisor and they will tell you that money problems are the number one leading reason for divorce in marriage.

We disagree. Marriage research and our own experience of working with thousands of couples tell us that money problems (and other problems) are symptoms of the real problem in the relationship. Most of the time when couples keep their hearts connected and their commitment level high, they will not look to divorce as they go through the financial highs and lows of life.

For the love of money—and what it can buy—is the root of all sorts of evil. I Tim 6:10 VOICE

Money is an important clash point in most marriages. One spouse feels they are being controlled and the other feels as if their spouse has no sense of the value of a dollar. One is carefree and focused on now and the other is long-term focused. One is a big picture person and the other is a details person. One is rigid black and white thinker and the other is open to see a multitude of alternatives at any moment.

Here are the most important actions couples need to take to prevent money from being the most stressful part of the marriage relationship.

  • Invite God into your financial decisions. It is His and it is on loan to you.
  • Spend less than you make. Jointly assess spending over the past couple of months and develop a budget for the upcoming month.
  • Let the detail person lead the family finances. Whichever one of you is better with details should be the one responsible for keeping up with accounts and taxes.
  • No secrets. All income, expenses, accounts, etc. should be readily and truthfully exposed to your spouse. Both parties should have full access to see account information and details.
  • Our money, not mine and yours. You may have one account, a couple of accounts, an account for bills and an account for entertainment, or some other version. No matter who earns it or how you manage it, it is mutual property.
  • Collaboratively develop long range financial goals.   Find where you agree and compromise on the rest. Consider how family vacations, recreational and leisure activities, education, etc. impact your long term goals.
  • Invest/save something every month. A good rule of thumb is to have six months of reserve in short term savings and the rest in long term investments.
  • Give.  Make room in your budget to give to your local church, charities, and causes. It will make you happier and there are blessings attached to your giving.
  • When there is a problem, have the crucial conversation that will strengthen your marriage and solve the issue.

We always love to hear from couples about what is working and not working. Let us know your tips for couples financial issues.

This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2015. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at [email protected].

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Category: Creating The Marriage You Want
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