We love our friend in ministry, Ron Rose. Ron has written much that has influenced our relationship and our parenting of our children. He blogs today at Faith Team.
One of our favorite books by Ron is “Loving Her: 30 days to a more loving relationship with your wife”. It is a month of daily reading with action steps husbands can take to strengthen their relationship with their wife.
Rediscovering Your Wife
One of the most important things a husband can realize is that they have so much to yet discover about their wife. Here are a few nuggets from “Loving Her”.
- You wife is not a trophy! You did not win her in a contest. She is not to be proudly displayed for a time and then put into a storage crate. She is an ongoing gift from God that you have a lifetime of unwrapping.
- Your wife is not a warden! You are not in a prison. Your wife is not the “bad guy” you have to sneak around and not the enemy you have to fight through to win freedom. She is the key to you no longer being in the prison of loneliness and disconnection.
- Your wife is not a ball and chain! Your marriage is not a trap that you need to escape from. She is your adventure in life that makes you feel alive.
- Life is full of imperfections! Your wife is not perfect, but she is perfect for you. You are not perfect and sharing your imperfections with her deeply connects you two.
- Commitment is Always! Commitment is beyond the momentary challenges. Commitment is when you are together and when you are apart. Commitment includes when “she’ll never find out” and when you are alone or out of town.
- God put her in your life to make you a better man. God built her to highlight your growth opportunities. Husbands who listen to their wives become better men. Husbands who resist, push back and deny, never grow.
- “You’re right” and “I’m sorry” are powerful. Be courageous and take ownership where you can. Your strength shows best when you step into responsibility for your actions.
- Move toward her in a crisis. When you feel like your marriage is the most vulnerable, or you know you have hurt her heart, move toward her with gentleness, warmth, grace and love.
- Give her a future together. Dream and re-dream together. Make sure she is a part of your future in all of your plans.
- Create team spirit. Work to show your support of the ups and downs of life. Share your challenges with her. Create we-ness to face the challenges of the world.
- Accept her where she is. You will not change her. What she needs most from you is acceptance that you love her just as she is.
- Lead collaboratively. Involve her in the decision making, but take the lead in having the important conversations.
- Forgive first. Show grace and forgive before she even asks. Forgive and forgive again.
- Build faith. Continue to grow in your relationship with God and be a partner in your wife’s faith growth.
What do you have to say?
We love to hear from readers. What on the list of suggestions have you tried? What could you do more of, or better in? What other suggestions you would add to this article? Do you know someone you need to forward this article to?
This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2016. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at Secret@LifeTogetherForever.com.