Marriage is hard. Especially when you have family cycle points, like adding a new member to the family, major medical issues, sending a child off to college, watching a child marry or divorce, or experiencing losing a family member.
Most of the couples who end up in a full day Marriage Intensive with us to try to save their marriage, are couples who let life get in the way of their relationship. Soon after marriage they began focusing on budgets, home making, parenting, chores, etc. and much less on each other.
After a couple of years, the only conversations they have with each other are about home logistics or issues and the number of positive interactions are overwhelmed by a pattern of negative ones. In that environment, it is usually not long before one or both begin seeking what should only be within the marriage from someone outside of the marriage.
Here are some signs that your marriage will last.
- You dated for more than a year, but never moved in with each other.
- You connect face to face more than you try to multi-task your relationship.
- You dote on your spouse’s positive qualities and features.
- You talk frequently to each other about things other than home logistics and issues.
- You felt good about your wedding day and your honey moon.
- You fight fair and allow your spouse to fully express their opinion.
- You give yourself and your spouse “me” time.
- You cultivate a culture of mutual appreciation.
- You make sex an important part of your relationship.
- You let your spouse into your day-to-day routine and do not harbor secrets.
- You believe in the same faith and practice your faith regularly.
Your most important tool to help you fall back in love is your power of choice. Start doing the things that you did when you first fell in love. Invest your time and energy in your relationship. And if you are stuck, get the help you need from a marriage professional.
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This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2017. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at Secret@LifeTogetherForever.com.