Early in our marriage we used to dream about what life would be like when we were our age now. Our dream included writing and speaking. When we were not traveling, our dream included living on a huge ranch with a number of homes with relatives in them. And a small train and train track where grandchildren and elderly parents could easily visit with each other.

Dreaming about what your future will be like with your spouse has incredible power to help keep love alive, strengthen intimacy and deepen commitment. Knowing that you are in your spouse’s dream of their future is just as powerful.   Knowing that you have someone in your life that loves you, wants you to achieve your dreams and helps you reach for your dreams is a great gift in life.

The Rubber Band and Busted Dreams

As we approached our mid thirties, it became apparent to us both that the dream of having such a place and living such a life was not going to happen just as we originally dreamed. As it became apparent that dreams were

Scientists have actually studied this phenomenon. It is as if there is a rubber band between our current reality and our hopes and dreams for the future. Over time, as our current reality shifts, our hopes require adjustment.

Dream Again With Your Spouse

If you want to live life together forever, you want to make an effort every few years to work together to dream again. Spending time together in a conversation listening to your spouse’s dreams and sharing yours…and building a new dream together, will build intimacy, help you fall back in love again and strengthen your lifelong commitment.

The “DreamTogether” Conversation

Here are some thought provoking sentence starters for you and your spouse to take turns answering together in a conversation where you dream again.

1. Some bucket list activities I thought I wanted to do when we were younger…
2. One of the things I remember we dreamed about when our relationship was young…
3. Not all of our dreams have come true, but I’m glad we didn’t ever…
4. I am so thankful to you for your support of my effort to reach the dream of…
5. The thing I am most looking forward to about our future together is…
6. A new activity I have (am willing to) learn to enjoy during my support of your dreams….
7. A time when I sacrificed so that we could reach for a dream together…
8. One of the ways I can help us reach for our dreams is…
9. Some of the ways that you can contribute to making our future dreams a reality are…
10. We might have some barriers to reaching our dreams, but I’m willing to…

What do you have to say?

We love to hear from readers.  What is so powerful for you in your marriage when you and your spouse have dreamed together?  How have your readjusted your dreams over time with your spouse?  If you tried the conversation starters, how did it go?

This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2015. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at [email protected].