Lies Hurting Your Marriage

Everyone is wounded. No one has experienced life exactly like you have but all of us have wounds. Sometime early in our life, in our interactions with our parents, or a sibling, classmates, teacher, or a clergy member, we were wounded.

In that moment, Satan told you a lie about yourself.

  • You are not good enough.
  • You don’t have what it takes.
  • You can’t do it right.
  • You are broken.
  • You don’t matter.
  • You are not important.
  • You are unlovable.
  • You are worthless.
  • You don’t belong.
  • You have no value.
  • You are defective.

Believing The Lie Hurts Your Marriage

Over time, you began to believe the lie. You watched to see how others treated you. When there was an interaction with someone that did not go well, you interpreted it as evidence that the lie was true

Over time you began acting out the lie. You became the lie. It drove what you did and how you interacted with others. And it still drives you today. It drives your interactions with your spouse.

It does not matter what other evidence comes into play, you continue to believe the lie. Your spouse compliments you and you discount it. You spouse does something nice to you or for you and you consider it manipulation to get what they want from you. Your spouse tells you how good you are or how much they love you and you doubt that what they are telling you is true.

What Does God Say About You

  1. You are accepted, just as you are. “Jesus … made us acceptable to God” (Titus 3:7 CEV).  You are completely acceptable regardless of what you have or have not done.
  2. You are unconditionally loved and you are lovable. “…my love for you will never end” (Isaiah 54:10 GNT).   God loves you unconditionally. You do not have to do anything for him to love you because you are lovable and loved just as you are. You can never do anything that will take that love away.
  3. You are Important and Valuable. You “…have been bought and paid for by Christ” (1 Corinthians 7:23 TLB). You are so important and so valuable that God gave his Son, Jesus, to stand in for you. Jesus gave his life for you. That is how valuable you are.
  4. You have what it takes. You “…can do all things through Christ…” (Philipians 4:13 NKJV). You are good enough. You have what it takes.

What If You Believed The Truth?

Imagine what it would be like for you to fully believe the truth that you are accepted, loved, valuable and enough. What would it be like for you to live out of those truths, instead of the lies you have been living out of? How much better of a spouse might you be if you believe the truth about who you are?

Try it out. When you begin to have those old thoughts about the lie about yourself, switch the lie out with the truth about yourself. See if you show love better and love more deeply. Find out if you forgive more easily and accept responsibility more quickly. Discover what it is like to take a chance and be more vulnerable.

What do you have to say?

We love to hear from readers.  Have you been living out of lies about your value, worth, strength, etc.?  How do you think Satan’s lies about you are hurting your marriage?  What do you think about God’s truths about you?  How do you think God’s truth about you might change your marriage?  What other suggestions you would add to this article? Do you know someone you need to forward this article to?

This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at © Roy and Devra Wooten 2016. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at


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