Kay and Brian were at a breaking point. She was focused on being the best mother she could be and had given little effort in her marriage for the past fifteen years. He would attempt to avoid conflict by bottling it up inside until eventually he would explode in yelling and threatening.
After one of his tirades, Kay asked him to move out. Separated, they reached out to their Pastor for support and he had them call us. They set up a last-ditch effort Marriage Intensive with us to save their marriage.
The Big Question
We spent the day together. God did what He usually does during the long day of work. He healed each of them in their most broken place and began to heal the old wounds in their relationship.
Near the end of the day, they each grabbed their spouse’s rings. Holding their spouse’s ring finger, we had them finish the sentence. “Our marriage is worth fighting for because…”
Reasons To Fight For Your Marriage
Over the years we have witnessed over two hundred couples, one couple at a time, answer this very important question. Here are common reasons we hear.
- I love you.
- God loves you and God put us together.
- I want to grow old with you and be together to the very end.
- You are worth fighting for and what we have is worth fighting for.
- You are my children’s mother/father and you are a great parent.
- I remember the reasons why I fell in love with you and they are still true today.
- You are my soul-mate and you are my lifelong friend and partner.
- I cannot imagine my life or my future without you in it.
- We have so many incredible memories we have made together and I know there are more we can create together.
- I made a commitment to you on our wedding day and I intend to keep that commitment no matter what.
- I want our children to grow up and see that God can redeem troubled marriages like ours.
- I need you and you need me. God put us together so that we can meet each others needs. I want to do that for the rest of my life.
Is Your Marriage Worth Fighting For?
So many couples spend all of their energy fighting each other. They think about what to say or do and make judgments about the worse possible motives of why their spouse did something. They focus on the worst possible moments of their relationship.
We believe every couple would benefit at any time by answering the question. Take a few minutes some time and finish the sentence in writing. Focus your attention on the reasons to stay. Focus your energy on building a future together instead of focusing on the past worst moments.
“My marriage is worth fighting for because…”
The next time you are face to face with your spouse, get the list out and share it with them. Look them in the eyes and tell them all the reasons why your marriage is worth fighting for.
And if you get stuck, and need help, reach out to your minister, counselor, or give us a call at Life Together Forever (281-949-8115).
God bless you!
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This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2017. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at Secret@LifeTogetherForever.com.