Tag Archives: christian marriage

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Is Your Marriage Worth Having the Crucial Conversations?

Too many couples have called us over the years in despair at the eleventh hour asking for help. Frequently when we meet with the couple in our office for a full day Marriage Intensive, what we learn is that they have unresolved issues that neither is willing to have a conversation about. The thing that is in their way, (usually because it elicits one or more of the Marriage Killers) is fear. They are afraid to have any in depth conversation.

Fear has so much power. When it is around, we usually get stuck. We become paralyzed and fail to act. We stop and hide. We run away from the issue as fast as we can. Fear debilitates us and moves us away from each other instead of toward each other.

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4 Things You Do That Make Your Relationship Problems Worse

Working with struggling couples for years, we know that sometimes the relationship problem is a surprise. Other times we know exactly what we did to cause the problem.

We have observed 4 patterns of reaction to relationship problems spouses engage in that actually hurt more than they help. They seem “good” because they keep us from feeling or dealing with the issue. That temporary relief fades quickly when the issue reoccurs. They always end up getting in the way of our goal of a lifelong relationship.

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Making Memories During Holidays

Holidays can be a stressful time for couples and families.  Negative patterns of interaction can multiply as almost all communication becomes focused on the tasks of the holiday.  Frequently feelings are hurt in the mix and there are long periods of negative emotions and energy.

Turn your relationships around during the holidays by implementing these tips for making memories!

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What People Are Saying About “The Secret To Lifetime Love”

Check out the online reviews of “The Secret to Lifetime Love” (2014, Jaba Publishing).

 

A Healthy Shot in the Arm for Our Marriage.

By Leslie Herron

“We have been married for almost 30 years and are doing well. This book isn’t just for those who are struggling in marriage. It is also for all of us who need constant stretching and working out to keep our hearts and our marriages in shape. Roy and Devra have an open and fun style of communicating what is really going on in our marriages and how we can mend broken areas, as well as strengthen weak areas.”

Great, practical stuff!!

By Byron Myers

“This a great, practical book on communicating clearly. Roy and Devra do a great job of simplifying how to communicate better with your spouse and live free from barriers that damage marriage. Thank you Roy and Devra for living an example for other marriages and sharing with us new tools.”

There are few gems like this

By monika

“There are few books out there that really help you, and seem to really want to help you with your problem (relationships in this case) and this book delivers.”

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Is Criticism Killing Your Marriage?

Criticism is destructive to relationships and that is why we have called it a “Marriage Killer”. Criticism is finding something wrong with the other person. Every spouse will do or not do something that their spouse judges as un-approving. You can choose to communicate your desire for a different behavior from your spouse in a way that brings you closer together, or you can choose to communicate your desire for a different behavior from your spouse in a way that tears them down.

Criticism goes beyond communicating what request you have of your spouse’s behavior change. It goes into language about your spouse’s character, identity, family, etc. Criticism is putting down your spouse and finding fault in them. This is often associated with assuming the worst about their intentions.

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Do You Have a Copy of “The Secret to Lifetime Love”?

What is the difference between couples who make their marriage work and those who don’t. In this book, We share what wehave learned working with thousands of families and couples. This book can be used be one person in the relationship, but is best used as a couple. It has been written for couples of all ages and stages. It has helped couples say what they need to say. The struggle in communication in which so many couples find themselves feels like a very stuck place. Applying the principles in this book and completing the exercises (alone or together) significantly impacts couples relationships positively.

Speaking and Hearing Truth
Purchase a Print, Ebook or Audio Edition

“Every Couple should read this” – Kari Ann

“Roy and Devra do a great job of simplifying how to communicate better with your spouse and live free from barriers that damage marriage. Thank you Roy and Devra for living an example for other marriages and sharing with us new tools.” – Byron

“There are few books out there that really help you, and seem to really want to help you with your problem (relationships in this case) and this book delivers.” – Monika

“What a great book for improving communication in your marriage! The information covered in this book is easy to relate too. At times, I felt as if they had stood in my living room and heard the arguments. I never felt judged or shamed. Positive and encouraging to husbands and wives! A rare find.” – Tia

“This book can be your go-to guide on how to fix, restore, or improve your marriage or relationship. All married couples should have it!!!! Very helpful!” – Austin

“This book contains a plethora of wisdom about how to deal with inevitable conflict in marriage. Concise and practical, it is well worth the short time required to read it, and a great reference when preparing for important conversations in any relationship. Very insightful and compelling!” – J. Wag

“A very truthful and realistic book” – ZRM

“This book will help you in communicating better in your relationship” – Dave Lappin