Making love is good for your marriage! But problems in the marriage bed are a common issue with couples doing life together forever. Your marriage is worth the effort of prioritizing physical connection with your spouse.
Sex Is Good
- God wants you to have good sex. The Bible is clear that God wants you to have sex for procreation, for recreational fun, in marriage only, and with your spouse even when you do not necessarily feel like it.
- Passion Keeps You Together. Your sexual attraction toward your spouse helps you stay together and strengthens other parts of your marriage. Passion is a key indicator, along with emotional connection and commitment, of the health of your marriage.
- Sex Keeps You Healthy. Regular sexual activity improves your immune system, increases your cardiovascular and pulmonary systems, improves mood and emotional health, and strengthens your cognitive abilities.
Common Sexual Problems
When we meet with couples in Marriage Intensives, we regularly hear from spouses that they want to have a good sex life. It is rare to find a married couple whom has not experienced some sexual problems in their long term marriage. Here are a few of the most common problems couple struggle with.
- Frequency. One spouse wants to have more sexual encounters and the other spouse wants to have fewer sexual encounters.
- Routine. Over time, the passion fades and sex becomes routine. Same sex, same place, same time, same way, etc.
- Uncomfortable. One spouse is more adventurous sexually and wants to try something the other spouse is not comfortable with.
- Health. The longer we live, the more likely health will impact our sexual libido, stamina and activity.
- Unfaithfulness. When a spouse looks outside of the marriage for the sexual encounters that should only be within the marriage, it affects all future sexual encounters. Whether it is pornography or some other form of unfaithfulness, it significantly impacts the relationship.
- Disconnection. When a spouse feels emotionally distant and disconnected from their spouse, they are less amorous.
- Unsafe. When a spouse doubts the long term commitment to the marriage, or feels controlled and pushed into something they do not want to do, they feel unsafe with their spouse.
Make Your Sex Life Better
You can make your sex life better and take action to improve the passion in your life and strengthen your marriage.
- Pray. Spend some time talking (and listening) to God about your sex life. Invite God’s blessings for you to have the sex life with your spouse that He wants you to have.
- Have a Courageous Conversation about sex with your spouse. Identify what it is you want. Have the Sex Talk and use the Pizza Tool to help make your marriage stronger!
- Get Help. If you are having health related issues, talk to your physician about the issue and get help. If you are having trouble talking to your spouse about it, find a Christian counselor, minister, or coach to help. Give us a call at 281-949-8115 and see how we can help you.
What do you have to say?
We love to hear from readers. Do you believe sex is good and that God wants married couples to have sex? Do you agree that all long term marriages have sex problems? Are there other common marriage problems that you would add to the list? What other suggestions you would add to this article? Do you know someone you need to forward this article to?
This article was written by Roy and Devra Wooten, authors of “The Secret to a Lifetime Love”. Learn more at www.LifeTogetherForever.com © Roy and Devra Wooten 2016. All Rights Reserved. You may replicate this article as long as it is provided free to recipients and includes appropriate attribution. Written permission for other use may be obtained at Secret@LifeTogetherForever.com.